The wilted flower.

The 16th letter to you.

Welcome back my friend.

If you stumble on this blog, or follow this blog, I sincerely thank you for your time.

I have been away since last year, and haven’t felt like blogging since my inspiration had plummeted. The reason is because I am once again on medication. I feel quite numb and aren’t that sensitive like I would be without medicine. It’s the most annoying thing in my life, but right now I just have to grit my teeth to bear with it. It’s not fun at all, but I do my best to find that spark again to live a life with medicine, although only temporary. I don’t want to succumb to my fate when it comes to medicine, it’s not my destiny to be shackled and live like a robot. And it doesn’t matter how many times I have to end up at the psych ward when I quit medicine, I will still do it.

Even a wilted flower dies, but in the end it will bloom again. I feel quite like the flower by the roadside, unyielding.

Even though I have a fight a war with the system of this world for so long, I feel undestructable, and I inflitrated the system little by little with my unyielding spirit. The hope for this world to change is my faith for God to have eyes to see how much humanity need to change their way of thinking and living; God will see it through.

Everything in this world is like clouds and mist, I don’t want to attach myself to it, and rather live an easy-going life. When I die I won’t take with me anything from this world. My body will get back to the soil, I won’t be able to take away anything I own, and even thoughts, dreams and memories will be only a matter of the past. It’s such a burden to carry anything I know will be gone when I am gone, so why not just think that nothing is important other than my happiness, freedom and peace? What do you think?

My life isn’t dark anymore, but I do wish to have my sensitivity back. Would you pray for me?

I felt wilted for so long, now I am about to bloom again.