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Because You Care.
Post from the past 16. I am awake tonight and smoke my lungs black. The distress of a chaotic world with no hope to survive the morning has made me want to kill myself slowly. Cigarettes and coffee are the remedies for my hopeless dream of fairy tale and romance. They both are the dark promises of death. I die a little tonight, and my life shortened many moments of hours. I have to laugh because the pack of cigarettes says “Smoke kills.” If smoke kills then why am I still breathing? Do I wish to die or have I abandon living? I live, and I die each moment of…
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I Live Like Art.
Post from the past 15. I am a poet, and I write life as if it was words that spilled out of my lungs, no, not the heart, because with lungs I can breathe poems and lyrics, with heart I can sing the joy of writing. I have with time an understanding for how people are unconsciously living their life. So time does speed up for some and snailing steadily forward for another. But after all, they could at least breathe, but probably it’s easier said than done because they have befriended stress like a pet and could not snail and rejuvenate in the time that pace slowly towards the…
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Be Loving.
The 39th letter to you. Laughter and love bubble inside me like a laugh of a child. I am not childish, but childlike. I mature through time, and I always look for the light. I am stargazing at night, and I stare the sun straight into the eyes. I am not fearful because life is too short to skimmed through it and shiver with fear. Why is there a need to fear unless I am afraid of death? I don’t worry about the end because life just begin and I am reborn, but I would not seek danger to feel the adrenaline. There’s the joy of life when you love,…
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The Expansion of The Heart-
The 38th letter to you. Live, so you can feel the expansion of the heart when you actually are in love. To live is not just breathing only. To live is to feel the heart expand, and it’s the expansion of your senses. That your taste food better, hear the note of each melody like windchime or bell ringing Kling-Klang in unison with your beloved within. Whatever you would call that beloved, your twin flame or your twin ray or just a romantic soul mate. But life, as I want to call it, is when you be yourself, wholly, without fear what others might think about you. There are colors…
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My Conclusion About Love.
The 37th letter to you. So far in life have I conclude what love really is. You can’t say you love if you haven’t let go of the outcome or attachment. Sure enough, we all tend to hold on to people who stir emotions within us, because it has become a habit, like an addiction. And of course, we can hold on to the one we have feelings for, but instead of holding onto the painful feelings they made us feel, we can choose to detach from the outcome or our emotions. It doesn’t mean that we give up on loving them, we just have to decide to love them…
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I Count My Blessings
The 36th letter to you. So by the hands, I count my blessings. I want to be like my Divinely Father who has everything and thus needs nothing from me or anyone else. I count my blessings because I am far richer than most. I have a bed and a comfortable blanket. I have food on the table and money in my bank account. I have a roof over my head to shelter me from rain and cold weather. All the things I own, which I have deliberately buy with wants and needs. I don’t buy things just because I think it will impress anyone. I don’t buy things which…
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Speak Your Mind.
The 35th letter to you. It’s time to speak up your mind and be the leader of your life. You can contribute to the world by being true to yourself and not back down for anything less than unconditional love. I do understand that you might fear not to tell the truth or face the truth and see it for what it is. As we are going through a process to evolve and develop our abilities, we may find it hard to stand up and speak our mind, and it’s ok, but know that you will be guided by your soul to be more authentic and true to yourself. Our…
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Tears & An Unknown Future
Post from the past 14. Tears stained my heart and cleansed my soul. I can’t hold onto something that wasn’t meant for me. By holding to tight I hurt myself, I love so hard with all my wants and needs, but in the end, my wants and needs strangle me and I become taciturn. I bend to the wind and breathe through the frost. The one I love doesn’t love me. The curse of being alone hadn’t yet broken or lifted. It bound me in a loop where I chase for gold at the end of the rainbow. Wherefore am I like this? I hope, but it was only wishful…
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The Understanding of Our Lives
The 34th letter to you. Do you understand when darkness falls upon the world, I am weighing the pros and cons of keeping myself going? Keep on living in a world where people only see black and white. Do you understand my worries and fears of being held in bondage within bars where I have the key to the prison of my mind but don’t know how to use it? Do you understand I don’t want to be intoxicated with vodka and whiskey because I am fearful of losing control of my consciousness? Do you understand that I breathe just because it’s something that my heart yearns for and not…
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Traveling Through The Night.
The 33rd letter to you. The mornings are to those busy bee leaving for work, while the nights are for those who are like owls sitting on the branch observing the world. There’s nothing wrong with the morning when the sunrise is coming above the horizon, it just that for the thinkers they daydream while “asleep” with bloodshot eyes; they fondly love the silence of the night too much to go to sleep early. I am one of those who occasionally have insomnia and couldn’t go to bed with a chaotic mind; full of thoughts and ideas and even if I sleep early my Muse will pull me up at…
"Perhaps the butterfly is proof that you can go through a great deal of darkness and still become something beautiful."
